I finished my map and video pretty quickly for this challenge. I think I have habituated that habit.

The pans are much smoother (you can see the difference.) I am excited about the growth. 

It’s been tricky for me to get an accurate bead on my skill level with any of the TOOLS I am training towards proficiency. 

My map was the first map submitted!  Wow!!  I have been down to the wire, or submitting unfinished for a few months.

Now I am hitting the Mark! 

I dread that the Community Manager is going to ask how long it took…. 

> XD Chim Explaining Flow Again. < 

Time? I have no idea.  I tried to keep track, for a bit, until that became one of the distractions, instead. 

Art is PLAY for me.  

Maybe I played with it for four or five days? Planting flowers. 

I made some mermaids!

Immersive<  Once I dive in, I don’t come up for a while. 

Focused is another good way to describe it.

I don’t get why this is such a problem.  

It seems like, when I am really into something…  <<<<< Blindsided!!

All this crazy drama/trauma starts up and tries to pull me into it.

Not my drama. 

I don’t DO drama. 

I am more into set design and lighting,

cue the music and

toggling in the timing,

than that ego feed/need to be center stage.

But here it comes, >> out of nowhere (story of my life lol smdh) 

I’ve upset Somebody Again!!!

It’s the unspoken coercion behind the tactics.  

I will get hurt.

I’ve known this since I was an infant. I am “not allowed” to do what the narcissist sees as a threat to their fragility and insecurities.

You see, they “identify as” the smart one”, thus (yank chain = dog bark) I am not allowed to be smart.  

[This actually backfired. Little me went all reverse psychology like Mikey, “He wont eat it. He hates everything.” with a side of ‘bitch you think you know me?’ (A good mother might notice when their preschooler cusses like a sailor.  HINT: I didn’t have one of those.)]

They “identify as” the artist,

and little me got her hands stomped

for reaching for the crayon the girls are supposed to share.

The list goes on…  pretty, witty, athletic, niche after niche that I am not allowed to be in,

because I am not the special one. 

(This is the Myth of Scarcity played out interpersonally.)

Once I toughened up to, “this is just how life IS” and my family didn’t “get to me anymore”

… they went after what I cared about. 

Whisper campaign…  you get to find out Real Quick who is and is not your friend.  

Shunned, alienated, ostracized..?! 

[Oh no!! Don’t throw me in the brier patch!!]

What? You mean I get more time to myself to focus on my stuff??  

[Accept this punishment! Lmao … yes please!]

Easier to see objectively (overhead view) than it is personally (first person POV)

the Player (you) in 2 person, watching the screen.

Now you can slide into the shoulder view… choose a side.

Shoulder Angel vs Shoulder Devils

Do you want good things to come from this?

Or 

Do you want bad things to come from this?

This is a special point of view because it demonstrates your Alignment.

[Alignment – vocabulary word of the day!]

little pecks …little cheap cheap cheap… “She’s low class.” “she’s broke” “she’s a hobo.”  [lmao]

Even if it is not the case, it’s what they want for me. [rofl]

Mistaken Identity:

Low income does not equate to low morals.

Just because They use it as a cop – out doesn’t make it REAL.

I got a good study on this topic!

I’ve put in years learning the ins and out of poverty,

volunteering at the organizations that address that issue and work on the solutions. 

I piloted four of these programs. 

I am prepared to be at those tables, rolling up my sleeves, and getting my hard earned calluses.  

I am not afraid to hit the ground.

Cause I hit the ground running.

I know how to operate in that world. 

I know how to… raise myself Higher. 

I am not afraid of work.

It’s a given.

You HAVE to work for it.  

Everything else, all that plotting and manipulations doesn’t DO anything. 

It’s all in your head…

and it deepens the dark alignment’s hold on you.

(fear, insecurity, past trauma) 

Heal up

Train up

Raise Yourself Higher.

Some games have a Reputations Algorithm.  This is Fascinating!!

You can get virtually hunted and imprisoned by town guards and townsfolk in Skyrim

(one of my favorite worlds where I have finished every quest, DLC quest,

all the achievements unlocked! Then I found out about MODS!!!  

…and decided world building is where I want to be!)

So free- programs are where I start.  

Let’s see 

what’s free

for me 

on my pc 

(and hope we can keep the internet long enough to learn it…)

So I found DAZ3d  Daz 3D – 3D Models and 3D Software | Daz 3D

I’m getting kind of skilled and want to show a friend…

And 

Apparently that program has a lascivious reputation.

Automatic shut down, and scorn.

(Ooops!! I triggered a chain and got auto-barked!)

Lascivious… Really?  

I’ve been in there for 5 years now, training up.

I mean.. I guess it could be done…  it’s not what 95% of the program Artist do with it…

Really?  Are you SURE?

Or

little pecks …little cheap cheap cheap…

Are you listening to gossip and you never really Looked For Yourself?

Gallery | Daz 3D

I think I want to call this It’s time to WISE UP.

You don’t Actually know Anything until you research it

IRL for yourself, with your eyes, your ears,

your fingertips asking the right questions?

You heard … okay cite your sources, show the receipts, the screenshots, the audio clips.

No. You chose and failed to investigate for yourself.

You chose contempt, belittling, dismissive.

These are in Your Rule Set/Tool Box

as acceptable go-to in a given situation.

The opposite TOOLS are Curiosity, Asking questions, and Trying to Understand.