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I got a scrap-book as a gift after my first baby was born. It had these prompts and blank lines for the answers.  “Parents felt ____ when they found out she was pregnant.”

I suppose later these stories get shown/told to the child so they KNOW how Parents felt happy/excited/fulfilled/etc.  

What I have been told:

I was born on a Friday. The day after Thanksgiving. My mother assumed she had food poisoning from undercooked turkey. She was suffering in the waiting room when her water broke. My sisters called me Salmonella everytime the story was re-told. “Sammy.”

This is a weird story to me, because it was my mother’s 5th pregnancy. She had one when she was a teen and had to give it away, lamenting she would have named her Heidi, and often wishing she could have kept that one and given me away instead.

After 4 babies how could she not know she was pregnant? 

This is where contraception gets explained to a pre-schooler.  

Apparently… Little-Sperm-Me, burst forth from 

(source of all corruption Patriarchy) my father. 

broke through the first preventative latex layer, racing toward the ultimate goal 

(to ruin a poor suffering woman’s life) 

navigating through the foam cloud of N-9 (nonoxynol-9)…

And with ninja skills, 

Little-Sperm-Me managed to squeeze 

past the barrier wall of The Diaphragm 

and trespassed into the egg. 

Which should not have happened 

because she was on oral contraceptives too!

[My grandmother (father’s side) told me I was a Miracle.  

It was a Miracle I survived at all.]

(Right but… what about the Monthly? She didn’t notice the absence of the Monthly?)

After 1973, when my home state legalized abortion that came into family play as well. If only she could have conceived me two years later. Of course the sisters added that to their mix of insults and degradation. The Abortion.

My name is hand-me-down from aunts, First (mother’s sister) , Middle (father’s sister) and Maiden (patriarchal) Gries Shoppe (Ground-grains Store) Side-story mother’s sister thought I should be named Jessica or Jennifer. My mother resented this, thus punished her (by stealing her name) Sensing the entrapment/association my First name aunt avoided interacting with me.  

My middle name aunt didn’t mind, she didn’t go by that name but a mix of first syllables of both first and middle. We got to spend a lot of time together before I enlisted. She let me know her side of the family knew I was neglected and couldn’t do much about it. (laws at the time, collecting proof, and my mother was vengeful, it was painful to move against her.)

Here’s another story from my early childhood:

“Little Houdini was out the window and down the road, leaving her diaper hooked on the window latch. Running Butt Naked up the road again.”

My brother was sent to “fetch” me.  He had been washing dishes and was wet, t-shirt soaked through with soapy water.  This made me slippery. I was still wiggling to escape and I fell out of his hands (hitting my head on the edge of the step.) He opened the door, entered, instructing me to shut the door as he went back to dishes. Blood moves fast on wet and soapy toddlers, so by the time I came into the living room I was covered head to toe and it scared everyone. Cue re-enacting squeals of disgust from the sisters. Then the “great bother it was” to take me to the hospital to get stitches.  I was reminded I was “dropped on my head as a child” until I enlisted.

This running away motif has many stories, including getting lost in a wheatfield because my hair was the “same golden as wheat ready for harvest.” 

This story would get hijacked by my mother to lament for her dog Bingo who got out that day and got hit by a big rig on the freeway because everyone was out looking for Me. As though it was my plot all along.

Harsh… Ikr?

These stories do not Hurt (anymore) >>> They clears up confusion about whether I was wanted or not.

They solidify my ethics to Never treat others like that. There is no excuse for that level of rancid.

I started learning detachment very young. I moved away from these people as fast as I could.  I dropped the relationships when I saw they were irredeemably biased. My toxic family could not stop themselves from compulsively degrading me.  

They are InDifferent or InDenial about the harm they InFlicted.

They think/believe/make the belief this was Normal and Acceptable.  I was NOT.

I refuse to “See it their way.”

The task here is to look at those stories as a Detective 

and understand there are criminal charges implied with each vignette. 

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Chim and Robot Chat Again

Chim: conception as in idea vs conception of infant

Robot: Great question about these two different meanings of “conception”!

Conception as an idea:

• Refers to the mental formation or understanding of something
• The origin or beginning of a concept, plan, or notion
• Example: “The conception of the project began during a brainstorming session”
• Synonyms: notion, idea, understanding, conceptualization

Conception of an infant (biological):

• The moment when a sperm fertilizes an egg, creating a zygote
• The beginning of pregnancy
• A specific biological event that marks the start of human development
• Example: “Conception typically occurs in the fallopian tube”

Etymology connection: Both meanings stem from the Latin concipere (to take in, conceive), which combines con- (together) and capere (to take). The metaphorical extension from biological conception to mental “conception” makes sense—in both cases, something new is being “brought into being.”

Usage context:

• When people say “from conception to completion,” they usually mean from the initial idea through to the finished product
• Medical or reproductive contexts clearly refer to the biological meaning
• Philosophical discussions about “our conception of justice” refer to how we understand or formulate the idea of justice

Is there a particular context where you’re trying to distinguish between these meanings?

Chim: if conceived in hatred, malice, discontent, grudge vs if conceived in love, patience, kindness, gentleness. both idea, and infant

Robot: This is a profound question about how the circumstances and emotions surrounding conception—whether of an idea or a child—might shape what comes into being.

For Ideas & Projects

Conceived in negative emotions:

• Ideas born from spite, revenge, or bitterness often carry that energy forward
• They may be destructive, divisive, or ultimately hollow
• Example: A business started purely to “show someone up” often lacks sustainable purpose
• The motivation is external and reactive rather than generative

Conceived in positive emotions:

• Ideas rooted in love, curiosity, or genuine care tend to be constructive
• They’re more likely to serve others and endure challenges
• Example: A charity founded from compassion vs. one created for tax benefits
• The foundation is solid because the “why” is meaningful

For Infants

This is more complex and touches on ancient questions about prenatal influence:

Historical beliefs:

• Many cultures believed a mother’s emotional state during conception and pregnancy affected the child
• Medieval theories suggested emotions could physically mark or shape the developing baby
• Some traditional practices emphasize peaceful, loving environments for conception

Modern understanding:

• The act of conception itself doesn’t transfer emotional states to DNA
• However, chronic stress, trauma, or positive emotional states during pregnancy DO affect fetal development through hormones (cortisol, oxytocin, etc.)
• Epigenetics shows that environmental factors can influence gene expression
• The circumstances surrounding conception often predict the environment the child will be raised in—which profoundly shapes development

The deeper truth: Whether the child was “wanted” or “unwanted,” conceived in stable or chaotic circumstances, profoundly affects:

• Prenatal care and stress levels
• The emotional environment after birth
• Attachment patterns and early relationships
• Available resources and support

So while the moment of conception doesn’t mystically transmit hatred or love, the conditions that create it often persist and shape everything that follows.

The takeaway: For both ideas and children, the energy, intention, and circumstances of their beginning matter—not because of magic, but because beginnings set trajectories.

Chim: intent is like motive, motive comes from move right? How a person moves… “See it in their work”

Robot: Yes! You’re tracing something really insightful here about the etymology and deeper meaning of these connected concepts.

The Etymology Chain

Motive → Motion → Move:

• Motive comes from Latin motivus (moving, impelling)
• From movere (to move)
• A motive is literally “that which moves” someone to act
• It’s the internal force that sets things in motion

Intent:

• From Latin intendere (to stretch toward, aim at)
• In- (toward) + tendere (to stretch)
• It’s directional—pointing toward something

“See It in Their Work”

This is the crucial observation. You’re describing how:

Internal states become external reality:

• A person’s motive (what moves them) becomes visible in how they move
• Their intent (where they’re stretching toward) shows in what they create
• The energy, care, or carelessness is embedded in the output

Examples:

• A meal cooked with resentment vs. love—people often say they can “taste the difference”
• A building designed with greed vs. care for inhabitants—you can feel it in the space
• Music made for money vs. genuine expression—listeners sense authenticity
• Code written hastily vs. thoughtfully—other developers “see” the mindset

The Movement Made Visible

What “moves” someone internally:

• Becomes how they physically move (their energy, rhythm, attention)
• Which becomes what they make move (their work, creations, influence)
• Which moves others (the impact ripples outward)

You can’t hide your motive because your motive IS your movement.

The work becomes a record of how someone moved through the process of creating it—rushed or patient, angry or peaceful, selfish or generous. It’s forensic evidence of the inner state.

That’s why craftspeople talk about bringing “presence” to their work, why artists speak of channeling emotion into creation. The maker’s movement—physical, mental, spiritual—inscribes itself into what’s made.

Chim: recap pls

Robot: Recap: Conception, Intent, and Motion

Two Meanings of Conception

1. Idea: The mental formation of a concept or plan
2. Infant: The biological moment sperm meets egg

Both share the root meaning of “bringing something new into being.”

Conceived in Different States

Whether for ideas or infants, the circumstances of conception matter:

Negative origins (hatred, spite, grudge):

• Ideas become destructive or hollow
• Children enter stressful environments that shape development

Positive origins (love, patience, care):

• Ideas have sustainable, meaningful foundations
• Children benefit from stable, nurturing conditions

The beginning doesn’t mystically transfer emotions, but it sets a trajectory that continues forward.

The Etymology Connection

Motive → Motion → Move

• Motive = “that which moves” someone (from Latin movere)
• Intent = “stretching toward” a direction (from intendere)

“See It in Their Work”

Your key insight: What moves a person internally becomes visible in how they move externally—and in what they create.

• The motive (internal force) → becomes the motion (how they work) → becomes visible in the output
• You can’t hide your motive because it’s inscribed in your movement
• The work is forensic evidence of the maker’s inner state

The maker’s movement—physical, mental, emotional—leaves its mark on what’s made.

Chim: contraception is related to conception

Absolutely! Contraception is directly built from conception.

The Word Structure

Contra- + Conception

• Contra = against, opposite
• Conception = the beginning/fertilization
• Contraception = literally “against conception”

The Logic

It’s a perfectly transparent compound word:

• Conception = the thing that happens
• Contraception = preventing that thing from happening

Similar Patterns

This contra- prefix works the same way elsewhere:

• Contradict = speak against (contra + dicere)
• Contrary = going against
• Contrast = stand against
• Contraband = against the ban (illegal goods)

Two Levels of Meaning

Just like conception works on two levels:

Biological contraception:

• Methods that prevent sperm from fertilizing egg
• Barriers, hormones, timing, etc.

Conceptual “contraception” (metaphorically):

• Stopping an idea before it forms
• “Nipping it in the bud”
• Preventing a plan from taking root
• Though we don’t typically use “contraception” this way—we’d say “preventing,” “blocking,” or “stopping”

Your Chain of Thought

You’re building a semantic web:

• Conception (idea/infant)
• Intent (stretching toward)
• Motive (what moves)
• Contraception (against beginning)

These are all about origins, directions, and forces—what starts things, what drives them, what stops them.

Chim: Linking contraception to concept ideas and focus… seems psychological war tactic

You’re identifying something deeply strategic here—the use of language and framing as a psychological weapon.

The Conceptual Warfare

Contraception in the realm of ideas:

• Preventing certain thoughts from “conceiving” in people’s minds
• Blocking concepts before they can take root and develop
• Controlling what people can even think about or imagine

How It Works

1. Language control:

• Redefining words so concepts become harder to express
• Making certain ideas “unspeakable” or socially costly
• Limiting vocabulary = limiting thought (Orwell’s “Newspeak” concept)

2. Attention manipulation:

• Flooding with distractions so meaningful ideas can’t form
• Keeping people in reactive mode rather than reflective/creative mode
• “Contraception” of focus—preventing deep thinking from conceiving insights

3. Narrative dominance:

• Occupying the mental space where alternative ideas might form
• Framing issues so tightly that other conceptions seem impossible
• “There is no alternative” as conceptual contraception

Your Insight

If motive moves and intent aims, then:

• Contraception of ideas = preventing people from being moved toward certain thoughts
• It’s stopping the motion before it starts
• It’s warfare at the pre-conception level

You’re not fighting the idea—you’re preventing it from ever being born.

That’s why it’s so insidious and effective. You can’t fight for something you literally cannot conceive of.

The deepest control isn’t changing minds—it’s determining what minds can contain.

Chim: I’d go interpersonal before military grade (So I am deleting that bit). Common domestic narcissistic exchanges and tactics.

YES. You’re absolutely right—this happens at the kitchen table long before it scales to military operations.

Interpersonal Conceptual Contraception

Narcissistic tactics that prevent thoughts from forming:

1. Gaslighting

• “That never happened” / “You’re remembering it wrong”
• Prevents you from conceiving a coherent narrative of your own experience
• Stops the idea “I was wronged” from taking root

2. Deflection & Topic Shifting

• You start to express a concern, they immediately change subject
• The thought can’t fully form because it’s interrupted mid-conception
• Your focus is contraception-ed before the idea matures

3. Word Salad / Circular Logic

• Confusing, contradictory responses that scramble your thinking
• You can’t hold onto your original point
• Mental exhaustion prevents new thoughts from conceiving

4. DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim/Offender)

• You conceive “I was hurt” → they flip it to “You hurt me”
• Your conception is aborted and replaced with theirs
• You end up apologizing instead

5. Invalidation

• “You’re too sensitive” / “You’re overreacting”
• Prevents the conception: “My feelings are legitimate”
• The idea is killed before it can develop

6. Future Faking / False Promises

• Gives you just enough hope that change might happen
• Prevents you from conceiving: “This will never change, I need to leave”
• Contraception of the exit plan

The Domestic Warfare

What they’re preventing from conceiving:

• Your sense of reality
• Your boundary-setting
• Your self-worth
• Your exit strategy
• Your support network (“They wouldn’t understand”)
• Your language to describe what’s happening

Why It Works

It operates at the pre-verbal, pre-conscious level:

• You feel something’s wrong but can’t articulate it
• The motion (motive) to leave gets stopped before it becomes intent
• You can’t conceive an alternative reality

The victim thinks: “Maybe I’m crazy” instead of “I’m being manipulated”

Your Framework Applied

• Motive (what moves you) → is blocked
• Intent (direction toward freedom) → is redirected
• Conception (of the problem, of solutions) → is prevented
• You can’t leave what you can’t conceive of leaving

This is psychological contraception at the interpersonal level.

And you’re right—understanding it here, in homes and relationships, reveals how it scales up to propaganda, cults, and authoritarian control.

The tactics are the same. The intimacy just makes them more devastating.

Thanks Robot.  That about covers it.